Looking for a thrill

There is something about loudness and too much noise. There is something powerful. I've been really into this band called Sleigh Bells this year, and it's mostly because they're loud. When I ride alone in my car, you know, no passengers or anything, sometimes I turn Sleigh Bells up so loud that it almost physically hurts me.

Now, I'm not a masochist or anything, but if my mom ever reads what I said about hurting myself she'll probably get onto me for playing my music so loud. I mean, it's dumb for me to do that. I know for certain I am going to have hearing problems as an adult and I'm going to look back on my teenage self and shake my head in disapproval.

Darn it, I'm extremely self-aware, really.
There's just something about music that gets inside my head. There's a song by Goldfrapp called "Train", and the synth line in the backdrop is so penetrating, so angry...it moves me, and not in a positive way. But I can't get enough - it's a little like torturing myself.

I was amazed by "The Social Network", and the main reason was because it's a severe sensory overload. The characters talk extremely fast and the music is massive: one scene with Justin Timberlake and Jesse Eisenberg in a club is the perfect example. It's a movie with no special effects (well, no violent or scenic ones), but it simply must be seen on the big screen if only for the transcendent loudness of the flick. The only other two movies that I can think of that have affected me (enveloped me!) like this so completely are "No Country For Old Men" and "There Will Be Blood". And "2001: A Space Odyssey", which was basically not a movie and just an extreme sensory experience.

Really I'm just a teenager looking for a thrill. The best part of the roller coaster is always the first drop, and that feeling that comes with it.

Sigh... I'll try not to try drugs!